I deserve at least four bucks under my pillow in the morning
Jan 28, 04:48
For getting my wisdom teeth removed today. I don’t have the pieces (yes, the offenders came out in pieces, how reassuring) but I think the midnight goblin of canines and molars ought to cut me a little slack under the circumstances. I used to get a dollar for a single painless tooth, so $4 for 4 teeth is more than fair.
My overall recovery is going decently, other than the extraction sites’ obsession with bleeding constantly and the persisting numbness in the left side of my lower lip. Also affected by this lack of emotion is the same side of my beard directly below. I was told that this could be a permanent arrangement in rare cases, but at 18 hours past the operation, it’s a little soon to tell.
I have become a master of swallowing with my mouth open, restraining my gag reflex, and subsisting on what would normally be considered fringe foods, only useful for meal augmentation or desert: jello, pudding, applesauce, chicken broth, and ‘clear fluids’. The former is almost certainly a less-negative way of saying ‘no milk’.